Should I or Shouldn't I?

Sigh... I am not sure should i or shouldn't i take half day leave? I need to go back to uni again to sign a form. Though it's not compulsory but it involves money. If i sign it, i will be having some money but i need to sacrifice half day of my leave. I don't have so many days of leaves anymore. I only left 1 day leave. If i take, i am only leave with half a day leave. But if i don't take half day leave, i need to give up the sum of money.

I am really in dilemma now. So Should i or shouldn't i?

I've Got a New Router

I just bought a new router last Saturday. Well, i should be happy that i can online again at night but funnily i don't feel anything at all.

I seldom go online now. I just go online for some transactions. Most of the time, it is used to download dramas and movies. But it takes a very long time to download a movie or a drama for me. The speed is very very slow.

Plus, after downloading, i can only watch it using computer. This is not i want. :o(

I Feel Depressed

I feel very depressed recently over every little things. I feel very unhappy and sad all the time now.

In the office, i try to hide my feelings. I do not want to let others see how sad i feel or how sad i look. Not only that, i don't feel like working at all. I feel working hours are too long. I feel very uneasy sitting in the office. I feel so alone....

After working hours, i just feel like staying at home. I rather stare at the television. I rather sit in the living room alone and quietly without anyone disturbing me.

I don't feel like getting near to anyone. Not even my closest kin. In fact, i hate my surroundings. I hate everything and everyone around me now. I just feel very uneasy with anyone now. I just want to be left alone.

This is really not like me. I just feel depressed. I feel so pessimistics. I feel that i don't do anything right. I'm just like being trapped somewhere.

Earth Hour 28.03.2009

Earth Hour will be held on 28.03.2009. Will i be supporting this campaign? Well, no. I won't..

I know Earth Hour is an awareness campaign. But i don't see any point of switching off the light an hour. Not only that, this campaign will only add up to more pollution because I am sure there will be a celebration for this campaign by putting fireworks, balloon and bla bla bla...

So what is the end result? More pollution.

How many of us will not use electricity for an hour? Even if you switch off the lights, what about aircon, fans and computers? Do you think people will turn off? Nah, i don't think so.

So i don't see any point of holding this campaign.

Abortion

I went to a forum and came across a title where a forummer & his girlfiend decided to undergo abortion. http://forum.lowyat.net/topic/973476

I was angry and sad when i read about it. I know it's their decision and we cannot interfere but i really can't forgive their action.

The reasons for their abortion are not even concrite. The excuses which they gave were:

1. Not financially stable.
if you are not financially stable, how can you afford a monthly instalment of RM2K for housing loan and RM1K for house rental now? You said that the economy isn't very good now. That both of you might lose your job. Therefore cannot have kids. Then what about housing loan and house rental? Don't tell me that if both of you lose the jobs, you all still can afford to pay for it? Or the bank is kind enough to pay for you? This is just an unacceptable excuse. In fact, it shows the couples are damn immature. One word to describe: Imbecile!.

2. Too shocking for their parents to accept.
No matter how shocking your parents are, they will accept it no matter what. I am definitely sure the parents especially the woman's parents will not allow abortion. It shows that they are not respecting their parents. They have not even discussed with their parents already take things into their own hand and make stupid assumption.

3. 'What if' the baby is born unhealthy, handicapped or they are having twin, triplets, quadruplets.
Yes, none of us can predict whether the baby born is going to be a healthy one or not. If everyone of us are having this kind of thinking, then there will be no more children in this world.
By the way, what makes them think that they are going to have multiple babies? The doctor has already scanned. And it's only showing one. So they think miraculously the baby will multiply by itself? Lame excuse. Another immature and stupid excuse made by the forummer.

They are already 25 years old but their mindset are still so childish. They are trying to find all kind of excuses just to gain their freedom.

Many childless couples are trying hard to have kids by spending thousand of dollars to undergo treatment yet they decide to abort it due to their selfishness. This is really unforgivable ! I do hope they have their retribution one of these days.

I really pray for the baby to have better parents in the next life.

Router Pronounced Dead

My home router pronounced dead yesterday. I am not sure what had happened.

Out of the sudden, it couldn't be used anymore. No connection between my computer and the router.

Sigh.. need to buy new router again.

I am in deep trouble

UPDATE: Pheww!!!!... Nothing happened. It can go through. Thank GOD !

Yes, i am in deep trouble today. I might lose Rm100 today for nothing. I have accidentally keyed in the wrong stupid contract no for the PTPTN. damn it !.

Though the ID no is correct but i am afraid it couldn't go through due to the wrong contract no. SHIT !. What the hell am i doing recently? I keep making mistakes. I am in trance....

If it can't go through, i have to fork out another RM100 to replace it. That means i am losing RM100. I think if riceball read this, he is going to kill me for making such a stupid mistakes.

I am given the responsibility to pay the monthly bills yet i make such a stupid mistake. I should be scolded. I should be punished.

Now, i am another RM100 poorer.

Pray hard that the RM100 can go through. Else, i am going to kill myself.

It's Raining, It's Pouring

It's raining again. Why does it have to rain at this time? Plus now is already 3.30pm and i need to go home early today.

How i wish the rain will stop at around 4pm. At least riceball and I won't be drenched by the rain. I know he will not come out early if there is rain at his area.

It's raining heavily now. Puhleeease let it stop at 4pm. I want to go home early today. (*SOB *SOB )

Sweetest Dream Ever !

I have the sweetest sweetest dream ever today. How i wish i could no need to get up at all. I just want to be in the dream forever.

How i wish the dream will become a reality. How i wish....

Gastrics ...

I am having gastrics pain now. Sigh....

Little Nyonya

Little Nyonya, one of the famous drama in Singapore. At last, i have finished watching it after watching for a week. I think the main purpose of this drama is to potray the Peranakan culture to us.

But too bad, i can't remember much about it except for their delicious nyonya dishes and kuih.
:oÞ. It also makes me want to go to Malacca to see the museum.

I won't say it is the best drama, but i do like this show. It does give me after-movie-effect. Until now i still feel sad when i think about the drama plot. I feel sad when i know that the leading actress and actor was not together after going through so much.

I do not like the ending though. I feel that they ended it too abruptly. Not a proper ending to me.

Overall, it worth a watch.

Selfish Pig !

Why recently so many people like to make me angry? What the hell do they want?

Every week i need to go to work extremely early for no apparent reason just because we car pool. And now want me to go home first and then fetch him home later. What the hell is it? I have no house keys. How to go home by myself.

Doesn't he know that it's going to rain soon. Plus i am terribly tired now. He can't expect me to come out again. After work, i need to rest too. I am a human. Not his dog!

Has he ever take my feelings into consideration? He only thinks about himself. Selfish pig!

Nobody cares how i feel but only care about how they feel. If i do not agree, then conflicts arise. I do have feelings too. I have my disatisfaction too. Why can't i voice out?!!

I Hate You!!

I hate you, XXX !

You are a worthless bitch !. An hypocrite. An idiotic woman !.

I can't stand the sight of you !. I have never even cross your border yet you are crossing mine!

Who do you think you are to interfere into my problem? Stop making those stupid remarks to hurt others !. Stop trying to act as though you care about us. Who doesn't know you are laughing at us !. Trying to put us in a difficult position!.

I know you are trying to tell me that you are having a happy family now. Don't show off too soon !. You will get your retribution!. You will be hurt someday !

Don't ever appear in front of me ! You and your family are definitely unwelcome here !

I will DEFINITELY BE BETTER THAN YOU ONE DAY !

I smell Insecticides !

Some of the perfumes in the market does smell very nice and sweet which make you want to go near to that person who wears it.

But there are also some perfumes which smell like insecticides. It really put you off. It is damn overpowering which make you feel suffocated when you walk near to the wearers. I do not call this kind of smell 'perfume' but i call it 'insecticide'. It really smell so bad that it makes me keep sneezing.

Unfortunely, many people in my office are wearing insecticides to work. And these people are more from lower class workers. (Sorry, if i have offended any of you but it's true). From the smell of the perfume, I am definitely sure the perfume which they use are not branded ones but cheapo ones.

Worse thing is, they are not putting a few dab on their neck, wrist, but it seems like they are putting half or whole bottle of the perfume. Whenever they are in the same place with me, it makes me want to sneeze and have bad headache. It's totally unbearable!!

If you think that you smell bad, why don't take a bath before going to work? Why make others suffer with you? So inconsiderate! If they really want to put perfume, can't they choose those better quality perfume or have lighter smell?

If only i could ban them from using it....

Extreme Embarrasment

I am in total embarrassment now.

Just now i got a call, without looking at the no, i thought riceball called me. So, without hesitationn, i said 'Darling....'.

Then, the person said "hello? Is it Ms. XXX ? ".

Shit ! It's not riceball. It's a stranger !.

I Am Lost & Angry

I feel so lost recently. I feel so lifeless and lost that i don't know where i am heading to. Most of the things that i planned and worked for last year did not achieve at all. It's really a disappointment to me.

It shows that i have no achievement no matter how hard i work for. Therefore, i have given up all hopes and plans. I makes me so lost now. I don't know what i am targetting this year. Even if i have targets, will i be able to achieve? It seems like i am always face with disappointment.

Let me take my study for example. I worked hard last year to complete my research and able to hand in on time. But what do i get in return? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Until now, i do not have any news about my work. When will i be VIVA? When will i be able to graduate? Will i be graduating this year? All these questions make me very depressing. It's not like i did not work hard for it.

I feel so angry at time. I feel so angry why do these people do not take me seriously. It makes me feel that what i have worked hard for all these while has gone to waste. I want to give up. I want to have I-don-care attitude, but i can't. It is unfair for me. I pay for my school fees. I worked for it. Yet, there is nothing can do now except wait. WAIT WAIT WAIT.

How long do i need to wait?!!!!

At least let me know whether can my work make it to VIVA? Can i graduate?

DAMN IT !

Dotty Face

From pimply chin to dotty face. I have two three acnes on my chin but now it has gone to my face. (*sob sob). I am not sure whether i have eaten anything wrong but the acnes and pimples just can't stop growing on my face recently.

Am i too heaty? I think i better drink my more to flush out the toxins in my body. I think my body is full of toxin now. :0(

Rain Rain Go Away

Rain Rain Go Away,
Come again another day,
Ms. Meatball want to go home.

Yes, it's about time to go home but the sky is getting darker and darker. What's more i am not driving today. :o(

Riceball is driving today but he had forgotten to bring an umbrella with him. Hopefully, he can walk to his car before it starts to rain. I always need to push him go home else i think he can even rot in his office.

It only takes me 15 minutes to reach his office yet he needs to take 30 minutes to come to my office. By the way, it only takes 15 minutes to reach his office from my office. Weird isn't it? He really likes to take his own sweet time to come and fetch me. :o(

I can't go home too late tonight because i still need to get up early tomorrow morning due to his meeting. :o(

Now i am praying that it will not rain until we reach home safely.

Retiring From MSN

I think it's time for me to retire from MSN. Though there is a list of people in my MSN whether they are online or offline but i seldom talk to them.

I did try to talk to them but after a few minutes nothing much to talk about. They seem so far away from me. Everyone has becoming more and more polite. Maybe some of them have become strangers to me or I have been a stranger to them.

Other than saying 'Hi', 'How are you?', 'How's your job?', bla bla bla... i don't know what else to ask.

So i think it's time for me to retire from MSN for time being.

Maybe after 3 -4 mths time some of you might see me online. :þ

Till then..

Phone Line Goes Dead

Latest Update: There is nothing wrong with the phone line now but something is wrong with my streamyx. The internet connection is damn SLOW !!!

UPDATE: I have tried to call that TM customer service at least 3 times but no one is picking up the phone. damn it !

Yeah, there is no dial tone on my phone. It started since yesterday afternoon. What the heck !. I tried to call TM customer service this morning but no one was there to pick up my phone call. It was already 8 am ++ when i call them. Don't tell me they have not started working.

I am not sure what is wrong with my phone line. I have checked that i have paid half of the bill. I don't pay full amount because their service is bad. After the stolen cable incident, i have no confident in them anymore. It took me nearly 2 months to solve the problem after many complaints. Do you know what type of excuse they gave me? They do not have the stock for new cable to replace the stolen one. What the heck ? !!! TM is the only company which provides fixed phone line and broadband yet they say no stock?!.

Even if they want to cut off my line for only pay half of the bill, they should at least give me a warning or send a red letter to me.

I am going to kill TM!

Promise Breaker

I am going to be a promise breaker soon. I am suppose to submit a paper but until now i have not written anything. This is real bad. Somemore i have already discussed with my lecturer the title of paper. This is bad. Real bad.

Plus the date of submission is getting nearer. less than a month.

I think i better do something about it.

Review: Canton-I Restaurant

Gone to Canton-I restaurant last saturday at queensbay mall, Penang. It's a cantonese style restaurant. The price of the food is quite expensive for some of the items which is not worth it to me. The snacks which i love most there is their sui kow ( regardless dry / soup ) and their egg tarts. These are the must 0rder items for me.

The dishes that we ordered that day are:

Dish 1: Siu yok & char siew rice.
The meat for siu yok and char siew is very delicious. The meat is very well-grilled. Every layer of the siu yok is well defined. The top is crunchy, the middle section is fatty and the last layer is meaty. Yum...Yum... This is quite worth it for its price.

Dish 2: Double combination porridge.
I ordered fried pig intestines and meatball. The porridge is quite plain. But i love the texture of the porridge. I was not satisfied with the fried intestines and meatball. The amount of the fried intestines given was very little to me. Only a few pieces. And there is only 3 meatballs. Quite disappointed. Not worth it for the price. >RM11

Dish 3: carp fish balls porridge.
Satisfication level is so-so only. Same as dish 2. The amount of carp fish ball is only 4 only. Not worth it for money too. > RM11.

Conclusion, if you want to go on diet or love plain food, then porridge is for you. Else, order other food which is more worth the price.

Service wise, their waiters and waitresses are quite attentive. They are able to give prompt response to their customers.

Boots Licking Good

I hate bootlickers. I can't stand the sight of them and feel disgusted by their action.

These boot lickers can be seen anywhere regardless in the offices, universities or even school.

Why do they need to be boo lickers at the first place? Do the feet of the bosses/lecturers/teachers really that "delicious" until these people can't stop licking?

Being boot lickers can really help you in your work or studies? Does it really guarantee you a promotion in the office or higher salary? Does it really guarantee you good results in the school/university?

I know many boot lickers are well-liked by the bosses/lecturers/teachers. Bosses love to hear compliment too...

These boot lickers treat these so-called higher level people like GOD. As though they are 100% perfect. Whatever they say is 100% correct for these boot lickers. And these boot lickers grab every opportunity to be near to them.

I have once asked a person why he wanted to be a boot-licker. He said he has no choice. But what does he mean by no choice? did someone put a knife at his throat? Is it a company policy that you must be good at boot licking? Does it mean that if you are not good at it your boss will detest you or even fire you?

He is a talented person yet he degraded himself. Shame on him!

If that boss/superior is really that shallow-minded, why bother to work for him?

If you are really good at your work, I am definitely sure your bosses/superiors will recognize your hardwork and talent.

If being a boot-licker can bring you far, then i think i can only remain at where i am now.

Daddy has gone back (*sob sob)

Sigh.... daddy has gone back home. Time passes so fast. A week before i was so happy when daddy was about to come. Yesterday, daddy went back to hometown....

How i miss them now....How i wish i could fly back to my hometown now...

I miss you all, daddy & mummy !

Go to HELL !!

To that idiot who makes me angry by telling me all sorts of stupid excuses:

Hope you have stomachache 24 hours per day.

Teeth rotting out and have swollen tongue !!!...

Hope you have big big acne on your face especially on the cheek and nose and swollen for few weeks !!!!

I am becoming stupid ( *gulp! )

I am becoming stupider and slower each day. Recently, i just have problem concentrating in my work. I keep making stupid mistakes in my work which i am afraid that i might lose my job one day. sigh....

I just can't focus. I feel so distracted and tired. It seems like i have not slept for few days. Even though i have slept for more than 6 hours per day, it is never enough. I keep yawning. I even want to close my eyes.

Other than that, I keep saying something wrongly. What i have in mind is totally different from what i blurted out. Embarrassing isn't it? My mind and my speech is totally not synchronous! I think people who talk to me might think that i am getting crazy...

I really need a break !

Dad is coming over !

Daddy will be coming over this Saturday.

Though i have nothing much to talk to him but i am glad he is here.

How i miss my parents......

Pimply Chin !

Acnes, pimples keep growing at my chin. What an ugly sight !!.

An old one hasn't disappear, a new one is here again....

I need help !!!!

The Crueliest Word.....

"Infertility". It's the crueliest word for every couple who wants to start a family of their own. Many couples after marriage are readily looking forward to starting a family.

Some successfully becoming parents right after marriage, some after few months of trying yet there are some who face with disappointment after trying for many months.

Not only do they face with disappointment, they have to face the fact that they are either subfertile or infertile. They are only hope is to seek treatment for the reproductive endocrinologist.

Some successfully have the children of their own after going treatment and the unfortunate ones once again have to face the disappointment. Not only disappointment, but also emotional and financial pressure due to the treatment. The treatment isn't cheap. And it does not guarantee 100% success. Some of them even need to try a few cycles before they reach the success ladder.

It's really depressing and full of sympathy for couples who have married for many years yet they do not have the family of their own. I truly respect, salute and admire for the couples who never bow to failure even though they have undergo numerous treatment just to have a baby.

For those people who have never gone through this, please be more sensitive towards the couple. We have no ideas how much pain the couples have to go through and how much tears they have shed during all these time.

Stop asking them all these questions "When are you having kids?", "You don't intend to have kids?", "You have already married for so many years, no plan to start a family?". It's really hurt. How do you know they don't want to have kids? How do you know they don't intend to start a family?. By the way, it's a private question. If they do not intend to answer, just keep your mouth shut.

Not of that, when the couple tell them about the treatment, some of these people even make stupid remarks like; "It sounds so techie.", "The name is just like some sci-fiction term from the movies." "It's like a place name" and laugh it off. It's bad enough these people are ignorant about the treatment, they still dare to make such stupid remarks. The couple trust them only let them know, yet these people hurt them with such remarks.

These couples are just like any normal couples who want to start a family. Instead of asking them when, why questions and making stupid remarks, why don't we pray for them and give them the support which they need most.

Parking Phobia

I hate parking. I think my parking skill is terrible. Whether it's L parking, reverse parking or even side parking. I just can't park properly. What's more my car is just a small car. I don't think i can ever drive big car like 4WD, mini van and etc.

It really take me years to park a car in a parking lot. It's really embarrassing especially if that area has a lot of cars waiting for parking. sigh...... Other drivers will start honking me.

I think i am developing a phobia for parking......

Standard Photo

I realized that most of the people whether photographers or photo taking lovers, definitely have a "standard photo". The standard photo which i mean here is : Take a photo of their own where they hold up a camera trying to capture a photo position. Not clear enough? Let me draw it out:



To me, it's like a compulsory photo to be taken by every photographer or photo taking lover.

If you look carefully (either in blogs, facebook, friendster), these people who claim that they love photography will definitely have at least a standard photo. (Sorry, if i have offended anyone. But it's really funny).

I am still trying to figure out whether they took the photo themselves or actually someone is there to help them to take it.

Can i say that once you are into photography, you must have at least one of this photo? It's time to ponder....

Next time, if you ever saw this photo in my blog, facebook or friendster, you know that i am into photography....

I am FREE !

Yes ! i gain my freedom at last.. no more late night work and no more deadlines anymore... Though i earn less due to no more part time work but at least i have more rest and i can be lazier. hahaha!!!!...

Good for me. Good for me...

PS: I think my VIVA is coming soon... worry.....

Review: Chillis Restaurant

I went to Chillis Restaurant last Saturday at Gurney Plaza, Penang. I was disappointed with the food there. I was conned by the pictures in the menu. It's really for ILLUSTRATION PURPOSE ONLY. Whatever you order is totally different from the menu. What a disappointment...

Main dish no 1: Grilled Chicken Portobello.
Totally different from the image in the menu. In the menu, the chicken looked succulent and the slices of portobello mushroom looked big. Accorrding to the waiter, the portion is very big. I agreed the portion is big. Not because of the portobello mushroom or the chicken portion are big, but because the amount of mashed potatos which they gave is a lot. So once you have finished the mashed potatos, you would have felt very full and did not feel like eating the rest anymore.
The chicken is tasteless. The chicken breast meat which they gave me is badly grilled. Hard and dry. No special sauce for you to dip. You want dipping, use the tomato or chilli sauce given on the table. The slices of portobello mushroom is sooooo tiny. i think 5 times smaller than the picture shown.
Overall rate: 2/5. The 2 is for the mashed potatos because it's really delicious.

Main dish no 2: Lamb Shank.
No illustration in the menu. The portion is quite big. Same as above. The amount of mashed potatos is alot. The lamb shank is soft. Can be torn from its bone easily. A special sauce is given for you to pour over the lamb shank.
Overall rate: 4/5. I think is the best dish for me.

As for the service, well, not that friendly. The waiters are not attentive enough.

I don't think i will go there again in this short period of time.